Monday, February 13, 2006

Married men joke

The wife comes home early & finds her husband in their master
bedroom making love to a beautiful, sexy young lady!
“You unfaithful, disrespectful pig!  What are you doing? How dare
you do this to me the faithful wife, the mother of your children!  I’m
leaving this house, I want a divorce!” The husband, replies “Wait, Wait
a minute!
Before you leave, at least listen to what happened”
“Hummmmm, I don’t know, well it’ll be the last thing I will hear
from you.  But make it fast, you unfaithful pig you”
The husband begins to tell his story .  .  .  “While driving home
this young lady asks for a ride.  I saw her so defenseless that I went
ahead and allowed her in my car. I noticed that she was very thin, not
well dressed! and very dirty. She mentioned that she had not eaten for 3 days.
With great compassion and hurt, I brought her home and warmed up the
enchiladas that I made for you last night that you wouldn’t eat because
you’re afraid you’ll gain weight; the poor thing, practically devours
them.  Since she was very dirty I asked her to take a shower.
While she was showering, I noticed her clothes were dirty and full
of holes so I threw her clothes away.  Since she needed clothes, I gave
her the pair of jeans that you have had for a few years, that you can
no longer wear because they are too tight on you, I also gave her the
blouse that I gave you on our anniversary and you don’t wear because I
don’t have good taste.
I gave her the pullover that my sister gave you for Christmas that
you will not wear just to bother my sister and I also gave her the
boots that you bought at the expensive boutique that you never wore
again after you saw your co -worker wearing the same pair.”
The husband continues his story .  .  .  .  . “The young woman was
very grateful to me and I walked her to the door.  When we got to the
door she turned around and with tears coming out of her eyes, she asks
me:
“Sir, do you have anything else that your wife does not use”